Chasing Miracles
by bichon2003
Summary: Matt and Julie have faced several struggles over the years. But what is their biggest struggle yet?
1. Roller Coaster Ride

Matt woke up one morning and called, "Lily! You need to get up so we can go to the picnic!"

His daughter woke up and asked, "Is Mom ready?"

Julie called, "Sure. I've got Luke awake. We just need to wake up Landon and Lexi and we'll be ready."

Luke told Matt, "Mommy says we're going on a picnic to celebrate."

Julie said, "That's right. It's our wedding anniversary. Sixteen years."

Soon Lexi was up. "Good morning!" she called.

When Landon woke up, the family was ready for the picnic. At the park, Luke immediately began eating while Lily, Landon and Lexi started tossing Matt's old plush football around. Matt looked at all the kids and said, "Julie, if you had known then that-you know-all this would happen to us, would you still have married me?"

Julie said, "Yes. What about you?"

Matt said, "Yes." He looked at his four kids-Lily, at fifteen, was the athlete of the family, while Landon, twelve, had Julie's literary love. Ten-year-old Lexi was also a big reader, but was much quieter than her siblings and had the closest bond with Matt, while Luke, five, kept the whole family on their toes. Matt told Julie, "I would not give up these kids and our life for anything. We've got great kids. Tough kids. Miracle kids." He then reflected, as he often did, on the incredible chain of events that had brought him to this moment. The past twenty-three years had in many ways been a roller-coaster ride, and one moment had started it all.

Author's Note: This is my first story, so please tell me what you think! I also have the events of the show taking place well in the past so the story won't take place in the future. Please read and review!


	2. A Northbound Plane

_Twenty-three years earlier_

"Saracen!"

Matt Saracen, a sophomore quarterback for Dillon High School, looked up at the sound of his coach's voice. The team's star quarterback, Jason Street, had just been injured trying to make a tackle and it looked bad. Matt was shell-shocked. He knew the game would have to come down to him. Matt put his helmet on and thought, _On a scale of 1 to 10 of "I'm never going to be ready for this", this is 100. _He really wanted to throw up, but he held back because he knew that throwing up would make a really bad first impression. His first plays did not go well. But once he settled down, he was able to find a groove and somehow win the game. Matt never could have dreamed that this moment would alter two lives forever-his life and Jason Street's life.

After the game, it was learned that Jason had severed his spinal cord and was permanently paralyzed. Matt was now the man for the team. He ended up having a great season and won state. He also sweetened up to Julie Taylor, the coach's daughter.

Although his junior year wasn't quite as good as his sophomore year, Matt had high hopes for his senior year. But hot-shot freshman JD McCoy came into town and was put in as the starter. Matt didn't play much. That really hurt. Matt knew he had talent and could play, but wasn't being given a fair chance. He thought, _No one is going to want a guy who can't even beat out a freshman_. But one day Julie called, "Matt. You got a letter from a college scout!"

Matt was stunned. He asked Julie, "What school?"

Julie said, "Marshall."

Matt asked, "Marshall? Where is Marshall?" But he thought to himself, _I guess it doesn't matter. Someone wants me!_

He opened the letter and it said that Marshall scouts had seen footage of his sophomore year and thought he had a lot of potential and wanted him to be their quarterback. When Matt went to visit Marshall, he was instantly drawn to the school, the scenery, and their incredible history. He told them, "I think I'll take you up on that offer. You're the only school that's giving me a chance." The scouts were surprised by that.

Matt knew it would be a challenge. Marshall was a small school and was Division 1-AA. But he also knew that if he wanted to play in the pros, he would have to play in college, and if that meant playing at a small, Division 1-AA school, he was going to have to swallow his pride and do it. Matt thought, _Besides, Marshall wanted me. Me. Personally._

That fall, Matt left the scorching heat of Texas for good and went off to Huntington, West Virginia.


	3. There's Something I Need To Tell You

Matt began the next phase of his life when he arrived at Marshall. He would be playing as a true freshman, a rare opportunity. But his first year at Marshall was not a happy time for him. Julie was almost a year younger than Matt and was still a senior in high school. Matt thought, _A long-distance relationship won't do any good. She'll probably go off to some different school next fall and I'll probably never see her again._ The thought nearly killed Matt. Julie was the only girl he really loved, and he knew long-distance relationships never worked out. So he was surprised, a year later, to see Julie walk into his room._  
_

"Julie! What are you doing here?" exclaimed Matt.

"Going to school, just like you," said Julie. "I had a horrible senior year without you. Being away from you for a year made me realize that I never want to be away from you again. So I decided to come here."

Matt was amazed. He thought, _Wow. I really have the best girlfriend in the world._

Matt's sophomore and junior seasons were excellent. Even though he played for a small school, he was starting to get some attention. And on New Year's Eve of his junior year at Marshall, Matt proposed to Julie. Even though they were young, Matt figured, _Hey, when you know you've found the person for you, why wait?_

The summer after Matt proposed, they decided to expand their ranks-with a puppy. It was actually Julie's idea. They ended up purchasing a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel puppy. The research had shown that they were very sweet, lovable family dogs, which was good in a house that would eventually include children. Their puppy, which was a tricolor, fit right in.

Julie picked up the puppy and asked Matt, "What should we name him?"

Matt said, "Teddy."

Julie replied, "Teddy? As in Shoebridge?"

Matt replied, "Yes. We're at Marshall. It makes sense."

Julie smiled and said, "I like it."

Matt had a great senior season, but he and Julie suffered personal heartbreak when Julie had a miscarriage. Matt ended up entering the NFL Draft and being drafted. He and Julie were married weeks later.

Matt began NFL practices, but found himself a little more tired than usual. Initially he thought, _Welcome to the NFL._

One day after practice, Julie threw a small blue foam football to Matt.

Matt said, "Nice spiral, Julie. But why-?"

She then threw a small pink foam football at him.

Matt looked at the footballs and at Julie's smiling face. He said, "You're pregnant again?"

She said, "Yes."

A few weeks later, when they went in for the sonogram, they were clearly able to see the baby. The doctor said the baby was ten weeks along. Matt did the math and realized that the baby had been conceived on their honeymoon.

However, Matt soon felt as if something inside of him had changed. During a Monday Night Football game, Matt suddenly had no air on his passes. The announcers commented on it:

"Saracen seems to be off his game."

"He sure does. His passes aren't going anywhere."

Matt normally excelled in crunch time, but this game, he had no energy. He felt winded just walking to the bench. After they lost the game, Matt looked in the mirror and noticed that his face was pale and his eyes were bloodshot. A couple days later, he went to a local clinic for some tests. When he came back, Julie, now four months pregnant, was waiting for him.

She said, "So, what's going on?"

Matt said, "A lot." He sighed and said, "Julie, there's something I need to tell you."

"What?"

"I-I-" Matt didn't even want to say it.

"What is it, Matt?"

Matt sighed, burst into tears, and said, "I have cancer."


	4. A Devastating Blow

Julie started crying, too. She said, "When did you find out?"

Matt said, "Today. I started feeling different over the summer. At first I thought, Welcome to the NFL, but right after the sonogram, I actually felt like something inside of me had changed. And I was way off in Monday's game. I couldn't even walk to the bench without feeling winded. And my face was pale and my eyes were bloodshot. I went to the doctor today. He says I have testicular cancer."

Julie said, "Well, what's the next step?"

Matt said, "Surgery tomorrow. They think it's already spread to the abdominal lymph nodes."

The next day, Matt had his initial surgery to remove the source of the cancer. The doctors told Matt, "There's something else you should consider. Testicular cancer treatments can sometimes cause infertility. In cases like yours, we recommend putting a sperm sample into storage in case you need it later." Matt and Julie talked it over and decided to do that. Once that was done, Matt had to deal with the press getting the news. And then he had to begin chemo.

Matt told Julie, "When I get sick from chemo, I now know how you felt going through morning sickness."

Julie smiled and said, "Hey. We're even now."

Matt later had a second surgery to remove the abdominal lymph nodes. While he was resting, a nurse told him, "You have a visitor."

Matt, still groggy, said, "Who is it?"

The nurse said, "It's a man. He says he used to play football with you."

Matt, a bit more alert, said, "Bring him in."

The nurse called, "He's in here. Wheel on in."

Matt thought, _That's strange. That means the guy's in a wheelchair. The only person I know of in a wheelchair is-_

"Hi, Saracen!" called the visitor. Matt was stunned. It was Jason Street.

Matt said, "Jason Street? What are you doing here? I never thought I'd see you again."

Jason replied, "Well, I heard you were sick and decided to come see how you were."

Matt said, "Thanks, man. That means an awful lot to me."

Jason said, "Noah's here, too."

Noah ran in and said, "Hi, mister. Did you used to play football with Daddy?"

Matt said, "Yes, I did. I filled in for him when he got hurt."

Noah said, "Wow. That means you played with Riggins. You know, Daddy once said that Riggins is his best friend, but his life isn't worth a-"

Jason clamped his hand over Noah's mouth and said, "Why couldn't I have had a son who _didn't _repeat every word I said?"

Matt replied, "Well, kids are like little parrots. You have to watch what you say."

After they talked a while, Jason and Noah left. Matt's treatments continued. They made him sick, but not sick enough that he couldn't get excited about the baby. When Julie had her second sonogram, they could see how much the baby had grown. The doctor asked if they wanted to know the sex. They said, "Umm-no."

After two months, the blood tests showed that Matt was in remission and he could stop chemo. Matt and Julie had faced and won their biggest battle yet.


	5. And Unto Us A Child Is Born

With Matt's chemo complete, they put their focus once again on the baby. Shortly after the new year, with Julie about seven months pregnant, Matt told her, "I don't know if I'll be a good father. I had no relationship with my father and I know nothing about babies. I've never even held a baby."

Julie said, "I don't know a lot about babies either. At least I had some experience with Gracie."

Matt told Julie, "Yeah, but Gracie was your baby sister. You could just do all the fun baby stuff with her and let your parents do all the work." Julie smiled.

They had a final sonogram a week before the due date to check the baby's position. The day after the due date, a non-stress test showed that the baby was beginning to not fare well, so the doctor decided to break Julie's water and get labor started. The fluid was stained with meconium.

After four hours of intense contractions, Julie received an epidural. Once that was done, it was smooth sailing. The doctors told them that the baby wouldn't cry right away because they would need to suction the baby's mouth and nose out. As the baby came out, the doctor suctioned the mouth and nose and said, "You have a beautiful baby girl!" Once the baby figured out what her lungs could do, she let loose.

Julie said, "Oh, look, Matt, she's just precious! And she looks like you!"

The doctor handed the baby to them and said, "Talk to her. She probably won't understand what you're saying, but she'll recognize your voices and calm down."

Matt looked at the baby and said, "Hi. I'm your daddy."

Julie held the baby and said, "And I'm your mommy." She asked Matt, "What are we going to name her?"

Matt looked at his new daughter and said, "Lily. What do you think of the name Lily Rose?"

Julie said, "I love it. Lily Rose Saracen has a cute sound to it."

Matt said, "No. She's not Lily Rose Saracen. She's Lily Rose _Taylor _Saracen."

Julie said, "Really?"

Matt told her, "Yes. She's half of you and should have both our names."

After making sure Julie and Lily were settled, Matt went to the waiting room to tell the team and press about the latest addition to the roster. When he went back in the room, Julie's family was in there, fussing over the baby. A doctor pulled Matt aside and said, "Mr. Saracen? I need to talk to you about something."

Matt asked, "Is everything okay?"

The doctor said, "After your baby was born, we discovered that there was a huge, tight knot in her umbilical cord. If we hadn't gotten labor started today, I don't think she would have lived much longer. This could have easily ended in tragedy. You got very, very lucky."

Matt smiled and said, "I'll go tell Julie." He went back into the room and saw Julie holding Lily, who was worn out already and peacefully sleeping, bundled up in her Go Herd blanket.


	6. Meet the Baby

Two days later, Lily Rose Taylor Saracen went home with her parents. She seemed to be completely unfazed by her new surroundings. When Matt opened the door, Julie's parents called out, "Surprise!"

Matt immediately dropped all the bags and the "It's a Girl!" balloon he'd been holding. A bunch of balloons had been tied around the house, a stork was in the yard, and a giant banner that said _Welcome Home, Lily _was in the doorway.

Matt glared at his relatives and said, "Coa-Eric, you know I hate being surprised like this!"

Coach Taylor said, "We know."

Gracie said, "Where's the baby?"

Matt said, "Julie has her."

Julie walked in with Lily and said, "Hi, Mom! Hi, Dad! Hi, Gracie!"

Coach Taylor said, "I'll give you your reward for keeping your mouth shut." He handed Julie a ten-dollar bill.

Matt said, "You knew they were going to be here? Why didn't you say something?"

Julie said, "Because I just made ten dollars. And I like to torment you."

Matt looked at Coach Taylor and said, "I've come to a conclusion about you. You're a sick man."

Gracie said, "No. Daddy's not sick."

Matt sighed and said, "What I mean is that he's sick in his mind. Everyone who does not live here, out!"

Once the Taylors left, Matt and Julie decided to introduce Lily to Teddy the dog. Teddy looked at baby Lily and immediately tried to lick her face.

Julie pulled Teddy away and said, "Well, that went well."

Matt said, "At least he's not growling at her or trying to bite her." The new family then decided to just spend time together.

As the days turned into weeks, they soon found that, despite being novices when it came to babies, they were naturals with Lily and soon fell into a routine. Every few hours, Julie would wake up and nurse Lily. After the early morning feeding, Matt would strap Lily into the baby carrier and take her and Teddy out for a walk. During these walks, Matt would talk to Lily about football, life and just about anything.

As the weeks became months, Lily began to wake up, personality wise, and would often "converse" with her dad during their walks. Her eyes changed from baby blue to chocolate brown, the same color as her hair. When Lily was about six months old, Matt made a decision to delay his return to football a year and get his strength back.

At Thanksgiving, Julie's family came and marveled at how big Lily was. Tami said, "I can't believe she's already eight months old!"

At Christmas, Lily showed more interest in tearing the paper than in her presents. Matt joked, "I guess that baby-size 'Go Herd' T-shirt was a waste of money."

Julie joked back, "You're cruel! Already corrupting our baby!"

Matt said, "Well, I don't want our daughter to be a prissy little diva."

Julie smiled and said, "Matt, there's no chance of that happening."

As Lily happily crawled around, Matt picked her up and spun her around. Lily giggled, as she always did when her dad played with her.

Julie kissed Matt and said, "Merry Christmas, honey."

Matt replied, "Merry Christmas to both my girls." Lily babbled and even Teddy barked. It was a Christmas they would never forget. They were now a family.


	7. Welcome (Back) to the NFL

As the new year began, Matt and Julie continued to settle in as new parents. Lily was now almost ten months old and getting big. Another thing was also getting big: Matt's desire to return to football. He had decided to take a year off to get his strength back. The work, though, was brutal.

One day, Matt's friend, Landry, asked him, "Why are you doing this?"

Matt said, "I'm not doing this for me." He looked at Julie and Lily, who were playing, and said, "I'm doing this for them. I want Lily to be able to see me play. She has changed my life and completely changed my priorities. And she doesn't even know it."

Landry said, "Yeah. It's like that for us godfathers, too."

Julie said, "Matt. Why don't you take a break and hang out with us? It's Lily's first birthday and we need to get ready for the party."

As the months passed, Matt continued to gain strength. By the end of the summer, he was at 100%. He made it all the way back.

Well, almost.

He would be the backup this season. But just making it back was huge for him. Due to his amazing return, he was the only backup introduced in the opening home game and received the loudest cheers. Although Matt was used sparingly and mainly in mop-up duty that season, he had a good experience nonetheless by just making it back.

When the season was over, Julie said, "Welcome back to the NFL, Matt. I am so proud of you!"

Matt said, "I know. But it would be even better if I were starting. A year from now, you know what would be awesome?"

Julie asked, "What?"

Matt said, "It's really far-fetched and probably will not happen, but a year from now, I would like to be on the podium with the Super Bowl trophy in my hands." They both knew, though, that that was little more than a dream.


	8. Round Two

Shortly after Lily turned two, Matt and Julie decided to expand their family and have a second child. They knew, though, that it wouldn't be easy. Matt was infertile following his testicular cancer treatment.

When they decided to have a second child, they looked up different treatment options to see what would have the best chances of success, deciding on IVF/ICSI (in vitro fertilization/intracytoplasmic sperm injection) with Matt's frozen sperm. Matt and Julie chose to start the first cycle in early June. If it worked, the baby would be born in March and wouldn't interfere with football season. Matt had said, "We need to plan the arrival of the baby so the birth won't be during the season. Who knew there was an upside to this?"

Julie joked, "Just think-the only part of the baby we can plan-the timing of the birth."

They would need their senses of humor during the process, as it was physically and mentally taxing.

The first step was hormone shots for Julie for two weeks to develop her eggs for harvesting.

Once her eggs were ripe, the doctor removed them and injected a sperm into each one.

They ended up with nine potential embryos. Matt and Julie decided to transfer three of the embryos into Julie for that cycle and freeze the other six. Matt wondered aloud, "What if all three take?" Julie didn't even want to bring up the possibility.

After the three embryos were transferred in early July, they had to wait two weeks to find out if it had worked.

Two weeks after the transfer, the doctor called. Matt picked up the phone, listened, smiled, hung up and told Julie, "You're pregnant!"

The whole family rejoiced, even though Lily was only two and didn't know what they were talking about.

A few weeks later, Julie had a sonogram to determine how many embryos had taken. The image showed that there was one baby. They were both relieved.

Julie joked, "This kid has a strong heartbeat. He or she is already taking after Daddy!"

Matt finally felt like he had made it all the way back.

Julie told him, "Play well this year. You have two kids to be proud of you now."


	9. Grudge Match

Matt felt as if this season would be special. He had a beautiful, growing family. He would be the starter. But he could never have fathomed how special this season would be.

His second pro stint was even more special because of Lily. She was now two years old and could understand a bit more what Matt did. He taught her well.

Before the first game of the season, Matt picked Lily up and said, "Do you know who's going to win tomorrow?"

Lily said, "Daddy win!"

Matt told Lily, "That's my girl!"

Lily continued, "Daddy throw ball! Daddy run! Daddy good!"

Matt laughed and said, "Daddy tired. Daddy have big game tomorrow. Daddy sleep."

The next day was the first game of the season. During warm-up, the other team came out. Matt noticed a player throwing the ball-the other quarterback, he presumed. Matt thought, _Something looks familiar about him, like I've seen him before. _When the other quarterback turned around, Matt saw the name on his jersey. He blinked to make sure he'd seen it correctly. He thought, _It can't be! It's not-_ The name on the back of the other quarterback's jersey was _McCoy._

Julie and Lily came out then. Julie said, "This other quarterback seems to have a rocket arm. He's going to be tough."

Matt pulled Julie aside and said, "Julie. Do you know who that is?"

She shook her head.

Matt continued, "That's JD McCoy!"

Julie said, "JD McCoy?! The guy who nearly ruined your career?"

Matt said, "Yes. I don't think he sees me. I doubt he even knows I made it to the pros."

Just then, JD walked over and said, "I feel like I've seen you before." He held out his hand, but Matt didn't take it. He said, "You have, McCoy." He showed the _Saracen_ on his jersey.

JD said, "No way! Matt Saracen? The guy I outshone in high school? I'm surprised an armless, physically skill-less bum like you made it this far."

Julie glared at JD and said, "Boy, you really are an #*$, aren't you, McCoy?"

Lily said, "What's an #*$?"

Julie said, "Nothing, honey."

They went back into the stands, and Julie was really embarrassed about swearing in front of Lily.

Matt said, "McCoy, is your life so empty and pathetic that you're reveling in taking my place eight years ago?"

JD said, "Yes. And I'll revel in this victory for the next eight years."

Matt said, "Let's settle this on the field like real men."

"Fine."

Matt went to his sideline and told the defense to blitz JD all day. As the game began, the announcers commented on the rematch between Matt and JD.

JD's team won the toss. As the ball was snapped, the announcers said, "This is the first career play for highly touted rookie JD McCoy. Let's see what he can do. How good will he be?"

A blitz came, JD fumbled after receiving the snap, and a defensive lineman recovered and ran it in for a touchdown.

On the kickoff, the receiver muffed it and Matt's team recovered. Matt ran for a touchdown on the next play.

Julie and Lily screamed. Lily added, "Go Daddy!"

Matt looked at the other bench and said, "In your face, McCoy!"

JD was blitzed constantly, picked off five times, sacked ten and knocked down countless more. Matt threw for five touchdowns, 400 yards, and was not even knocked down once in a 45-0 wipeout.

One of JD's teammates said, "Come on. No harm done."

JD replied, "Yeah. Just a few broken ribs."

At home, Matt said, "Look, Julie, I know I was holding a grudge-"

Julie interrupted, "And you had every right to. Look, he humiliated you, insulted you and made you look bad. He was a jerk and deserved what he got. I'm glad you pounded him."

Matt knew she was right. This was the most thrilling victory he had up to that point.

Authors note: Please, please, please, send some reviews! I really want to know what people think!


	10. Full Circle

After that game, Matt felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders that he hadn't even known was there. The season continued and Matt was playing phenomenal.

Julie and Lily were at all the home games. For away games, they would watch on TV. Lily would always cheer, "Go, Daddy!" when she saw Matt. The national media was getting word about Matt's amazing comeback and tremendous play.

Halfway through the season, Matt was looking in the paper and saw his name leading most of the major passing statistics for the year. He blinked and thought, _That can't be right._ He looked again and saw that he _had _seen it correctly. He was flabbergasted. Matt knew he was having a good year, but he never imagined it being _that_ good.

The team ended up finishing 13-3 with the number one overall seed and a first-round bye in the playoffs. Matt dominated the first two playoff games and they were in the Super Bowl.

The Super Bowl was in Atlanta that year, and Julie wanted to fly to the game with Lily.

Matt asked, "Do you think that's safe? You're seven months pregnant now."

Julie said, "Yes, it is. The last month is when you can't fly. Besides, this is the Super Bowl. I wouldn't miss it for anything. I am so proud of you. And I want Lily to experience it, too."

On game day, Matt decked Lily out in a miniature jersey and said, "What's today, Lily?"

Lily said, "Game day!"

Matt asked, "Yes, but what game is it?"

Lily replied, "Supa Bowl!"

Matt asked, "And who's going to win?"

Lily cheered, "Daddy!"

Matt picked Lily up and said, "That's my girl!"

The game was a gritty, tight, back-and-forth affair, but when time ran out, Matt was a Super Bowl champion. When he stood on the podium, Julie by his side, the Super Bowl trophy in one hand, and Lily in the other, he remembered his dream of a year earlier. It was now reality.

As the cameras clicked away, Matt kept saying, "I can't believe it! I'm just in shock! My life has really come full circle and I'm a Super Bowl champion! It just doesn't seem real!"

The reporter asked him, "What will you do next?"

Matt replied, "I'm going to Disney World!"

The next morning, in their hotel room, Matt woke up and told Julie, "I actually won the Super Bowl!"

Julie said, "No way!"

Lily repeated, "No way!"

Matt picked Lily up and showed her a picture of them on the podium a photographer had snapped the night before. He said, "Lily, look! That's us!"

Lily added, "We famous!"

The next day, they headed off to Disney World. Matt would never forget this victory. It was a moment he would treasure forever.


	11. First Breath

Matt knew, after winning the Super Bowl, that his life would never be the same. People would interrupt his daily walks with Lily to ask for an autograph or a picture. Matt and Julie, though, were more concerned about getting ready for the new baby. Lily was getting very impatient. She turned three in March and was eager for the new baby to arrive.

Five days after Lily's birthday, and two weeks before the baby was due, Julie said she wanted to rest.

Matt said, "No problem. I'll go to church with Lily and take her out for Daddy-daughter day. We'll stay out of your way completely."

Early that afternoon, when Matt and Lily were at Lily's favorite kiddie restaurant, Julie called Matt and said, "I think I'm in labor." After they hung up, Matt told Lily, "Mommy's having the baby!"

Lily said, "Yay!"

Matt picked up his cup of water and said, "To the baby."

Lily picked up her chocolate milk and repeated, "To the baby."

Matt and Lily left, and Matt soon found that being a second-time dad hadn't made him any less nervous.

After putting Lily in her car seat, he said, "We need to get home quickly." Matt never had done this before, and he knew it was stupid, but he floored it. He said, "Lily, never do this." He sped all the way home. Amazingly, he was not caught.

When they arrived home, Lily squealed, "That was awesome!"

Matt thought, _Great. My daughter is already a speed demon._

At the hospital, they learned that Julie was in active labor. She ended up receiving her epidural and was soon comfortable again.

Lily's birth had been relatively smooth, but that was not the case with this one. During the pushing, it was discovered that the baby was breech. The birth was long and difficult, and the baby had to be pulled out. It was a boy-Landon Gabriel Taylor Saracen.

He was blue and not breathing and needed to be resuscitated. Matt and Julie were terrified, but Landon soon let loose a loud scream.

When they brought him back, Julie looked at him and said, "Oh, poor baby. Your face is all swollen."

Matt said, "Yeah, we'll have to wait a couple days for the swelling to go down."

Lily was allowed to come in then and see her baby brother.

Matt said, "Lily, this is your new baby brother. Do you like him?"

Lily said, "Yes. What's his name?"

Julie said, "Landon."

Lily kissed him and said, "Hello, Landon!"

Two days later, they noticed that the swelling on Landon's face had gone down. They realized how cute he was, with his blond hair and blue eyes. He looked like Julie, and Julie said, "Well, it's only fair. Lily's a mini-you."

The doctor said, "Landon is beautiful and as healthy as his big sister and there is not a thing wrong with him."

Matt, Julie, Lily and Landon then went home, eager to begin life as a family of four.


	12. Hockey, Pancakes and Christmas Bells

Landon's homecoming was much more low-key than Lily's had been. There were no relatives ambushing, no big banners or balloons. There was just Matt, Julie, Lily and Landon spending time together as a family.

Lily was a natural big sister and was happy that her baby brother was finally here.

Landon was a pretty mellow baby most of the time, but not if he was hungry or needed a diaper change.

That summer, when Landon was about four months old, Lily wanted to start ice-skating. Matt decided to let her try. He soon discovered that Lily was a natural skater. She had little trouble keeping her balance, unlike most three-year-olds.

Lily asked, "Daddy, what sport can be played on ice?"

Matt thought and said, "Well, there's always hockey."

Lily asked, "Can I play hockey?"

Matt told her, "In a couple years, maybe. But not right now. Just settle for watching it."

Lily said, "Okay."

A few weeks later, the new season began. Matt soon learned that defending the crown was much harder than chasing it. Although Matt proved that his previous season was not a fluke, the defense was much more porous than the year before.

During the season, Matt and his family went to the ceremony for the thirty-year anniversary of the tragedy at Marshall. After the ceremony, Matt said, "Landon, your daddy played at Marshall in college. Someday, in about twenty years, you'll be following in his footsteps. You'll be Landon Saracen, quarterback, number seven. And I know you'll make me, Mommy, Lily and seventy-five souls very proud."

On Christmas Eve, Matt had a game. His team needed a win to remain in playoff contention. Although Matt played well, the defense collapsed and the team lost.

After the game, Matt and Julie took Lily and Landon to church, where Julie noticed that Matt was unusually quiet. After church, Julie was getting Lily in her pajamas when she said, "Matt, you've had a sour attitude. What's going on?"

Matt sighed and said, "I lost. I wanted you and the kids to be proud of me."

Julie said, "We are. Just because you lost doesn't make us any less proud of you. You did your best, you tried your hardest, and the other team beat you fair and square. The kids have to know that Daddy can't win all the time." Matt knew she was right. Julie added, "Come on. It's Christmas Eve."

Lily cried, "Mommy, I'm hungry."

Matt said, "Oh my goodness, we forgot to feed the kids. And we don't have too much."

Julie said, "Then let's go to a restaurant."

Matt said, "Julie, be reasonable. It's Christmas Eve. What's going to be open?"

Matt said, "This is the restaurant? The House of Pancakes?"

Julie said, "So? We're in a jam, it's open, and the kids will love it." As they got out of the car, Matt said, "You didn't even change Lily? She's in her pajamas!"

Julie said, "She's three years old. And it's not church."

Matt exclaimed, "I can't believe we went to The House of Pancakes for dinner on Christmas Eve!"

Lily said, "Daddy, you need to turn that frown upside-down."

They got in their booth and Lily said, "Daddy, can we sing the Snoopy song?" Matt said yes. He and Lily started singing, "Christmas bells, those Christmas bells, ringing through the land, bringing peace to all the world, and good will to men." Lily said, "I love that song."

Matt said, "Me too."

"Me too," said the waitress who had come to take their orders. "Merry Christmas!" "Merry Christmas!" called Matt, Julie and Lily. Matt was out of his post game funk. _Amazing,_ he thought, _how a few Christmas bells can cheer a guy up._ This ended up being the best Christmas Eve of all.


	13. Two Can Become One

NewCastle81:Thanks for the review! It'll get even more serious in the next few chapters.

After Landon's birth, practically everyone Matt and Julie knew assumed that they weren't going to have any more kids. People said, "You have a girl and a boy, so you have the perfect family." But they weren't done by any means. People thought they were crazy for wanting to go through it all over again, especially after Landon's difficult birth. But they didn't feel like they were done. So shortly after Landon turned one, they started IVF with the frozen embryos to try to have a third child.

The first attempt didn't take, but the second attempt was successful-times two. The initial sonogram showed that they were having twins. But two months later, a sonogram showed that one of the babies had died. Matt and Julie mourned, but were grateful that one baby was still alive.

About a week later, after Matt had taken Lily, now four, to school and put Landon down for a nap, he sat on the couch with Julie, a rare opportunity to be alone. A few minutes later, Julie said, "Matt, my water broke."

Matt said, "What? You're not even fifteen weeks!"

They rushed to the hospital, and Matt had somehow managed to get Landon out of his crib and into his carseat without waking him up.

The specialist did an ultrasound and said, "The baby is still alive, and your cervix is closed, but your membranes have ruptured. Amniotic fluid is crucial at this stage. Without amniotic fluid, the lungs will not develop properly, and the baby will probably be unable to breathe. Also, because the bones are still soft, the baby will probably be severely deformed. And you are at great risk for infection."

Julie asked, "What do you think we should do?"

The specialist said, "In a situation like this, the best option would be to terminate the pregnancy."

Julie immediately said, "We will never do that! I'd do that if I wanted to fail as a mother! The baby is still alive, and as long as he or she is still alive, I will fight for my child!"

Julie decided to go on antibiotics to prevent infection and hospital bed rest for monitoring. Matt knew he needed someone to help with the kids while Julie was hospitalized. He told Julie, "We need someone we know, someone we trust, someone with no life-Landry!"

Julie said, "This should be good!"

Matt gave Landry a list of instructions and said, "Thank you for doing this for us. This is a GIANT favor."

Landry replied, "What are friends for?"

Julie started her hospital bed rest, hoping to get several more months of development for the baby to have a fighting chance.


	14. God Bless America

Matt had thought nothing could get lower than this. And then came 9/11.

Lily and Matt had been watching _Sesame Street _when Julie called and said, "Matt, turn on the TV."

Matt said, "It is on. I'm watching _Sesame Street _with Lily before school."

Julie said, "Rethink those plans."

Matt changed the channel and was horrified by what he saw. He gasped and said, "Oh, my God in heaven! Oh, my God!" He then noticed that Lily was next to him and said, "Lily, go. You're not supposed to see this."

Lily asked, "Why not? And you need to take me to school."

Matt said, "Change of plans. You're not going to school today, Lily."

Lily asked, "Why not?"

Matt said, "It's a grown-up thing. Tell you what. Lily, why don't you go upstairs and watch _Winnie the Pooh_?"

Lily picked up the _Winnie the Pooh _video and said, "Okay. But something's going on, and you're not telling me what."

That night, Matt was still numb with shock from the events of the day. Lily came in and said, "Daddy, can Landon and I sleep in your room?"

Matt said, "I think that would make me feel a whole lot better, Lily."

When the NFL returned two weeks later, it was very emotional. In the pre game huddle, Matt called, "God Bless America on three! One, two, three-"

The whole team replied, "God Bless America!"

Author's Note: I know 9/11 was actually in 2001, but I made the events of the show take place 20-something years ago because I don't want my story to take place in years that haven't happened yet. Please read and review!


	15. A Season of Hope

After 9/11, Matt knew the problems in his life were small compared to the problems of the nation. But he still couldn't help worrying about Julie and the baby, and it affected his play. By early October, Julie was at twenty weeks and still had a long way to go. Although some amniotic fluid had reaccumulated, the level of fluid was still low. On a happier note, in early October they also found out that the baby was a girl.

Matt's play was not as good this season, and no doubt it was due to the stress. Although the stress let up somewhat by early November once Julie hit twenty-four weeks and the baby was viable if born now, it was still there. Matt's head was not in it. The week after Thanksgiving, when Julie was almost twenty-eight weeks, Matt had one of his worst games ever and the team fell to 5-5.

After the game, he visited Julie in the hospital. Julie said, "I saw the game today. Boy, did you get spanked. What is up with you? One game you look great and the next you look awful!"

Matt sighed and said, "I don't know. I think it's the stress. I keep thinking about you and the baby and wondering if you're okay."

Julie said, "Matt, the baby and I will be fine. We're in good hands. Matt, I want you to go out and play for us. It'll be your motivation."

Armed with that, Matt went on a rampage for an undefeated December. Not even he and the kids coming down with strep throat stopped it. By Christmas, Julie was almost thirty-two weeks and her fluid levels were higher than they'd been in a long time. This gave Matt a glimmer of hope in a season of hope. But little did they know that the January from hell was right around the corner.


	16. The January From Hell Part 1: Perfect

The January from hell actually began a month earlier. When Matt and both kids had come down with strep throat, the doctor said he was concerned about Landon, now almost two. He noticed that Landon was in the 90th percentile for height, but only 15th percentile for weight. He told Matt, "Your son seems to be a bit scrawny. What does he eat?"

Matt replied, "Anything edible."

The doctor continued, "Well, he appears to be malnourished."

Matt said, "That's impossible! He can't be malnourished! All he ever does is eat. And he's very happy and alert."

The doctor continued, "Well, he's not putting on much weight. We need to do a blood test."

Landon did not cooperate well for the blood test and kept screaming, "Mama! Mama!" But they were finally able to get a sample.

The doctor called later and said the blood test showed an elevated level of a certain blood marker that indicated problems with the pancreas and the need for further testing. Matt called Julie and told her about the results.

The doctors later said that they wanted to do two sweat tests a week apart. Matt thought, _Why would they need to do that?_ But he said, "Sure. The 9th and the 16th of January work for us."

Three days after the second sweat test was the first playoff game, and it was Matt's birthday. In the afternoon, Julie called and said, "Matt, I think I'm in labor."

Matt said, "What? I have a game today, it's my birthday and you're not due for five more weeks. You can't possibly be in labor because we're not ready!"

Julie said, "Well, ready or not, here she comes!"

Matt rushed to the hospital. When Julie was pushing, the baby's heart rate began to drop. The doctor said the baby was tired and they needed to do a C-section. The surgery went quickly and the doctor said, "You have a baby girl! She looks great!"

Julie asked, "What should we name her?"

Matt said, "You went through so much to get this far, you name her."

Julie decided on Lexi Pamela Taylor Saracen, and Matt agreed. As Matt walked out of the operating room with Lexi, Julie added, "Happy Birthday!"

Matt looked in Lexi's face. She looked exactly like Matt, even more so than Lily, and her eyes were wide open, and she was taking in her new surroundings. In that moment, as Matt held Lexi in his arms, everything was perfect.


	17. The January From Hell Part 2: NICU Blues

Matt followed Lexi to the nursery. Even though she seemed to be straining a bit to breathe, she looked great otherwise.

Matt then went to play in the game. He said, "I need to throw for three touchdowns now, since I have three kids." Lexi had been the best birthday present he had ever gotten in his life. Matt played well and got three touchdowns despite missing the first quarter.

After the game, Matt called Julie. Julie said, "Matt, Lexi is in the NICU on a ventilator!"

Matt asked, "What happened?"

Julie said, "I don't know!"

Matt rushed back to the hospital and saw Lexi breathing with a machine. He looked at Lexi and noticed that her face looked pale and tired. Matt said, "Oh, you poor thing!"

The problem, it turned out, was that Lexi's lungs were five weeks behind development.

As Matt left to talk to Julie, he noticed the doctor who had done Landon's sweat tests. He asked, "Have you heard anything about Landon?"

The doctor said, "Your pediatrician will bring you in this week to discuss the results. Does Wednesday work for you?"

Matt was freaked out inside, because he knew that answer meant something was wrong. But he said, as calmly as he could, "Sure. Wednesday works."

Author's Note: You'll probably kill me with this ending, as it's a major cliffhanger. What is wrong with Landon? I'd love to here some guesses. Please review or I won't update as frequently!


	18. The January From Hell Part 3: Broken

Four days later, Matt and Julie went to the doctor to hear the results of the sweat tests on Landon. Even though Julie was still recovering from her C-section, she insisted on being there when they heard the results.

The doctor led them into a small room in back. Matt was thinking, _Something is wrong. This isn't going to be good._

The doctor said, "How is Landon?"

Julie said, "He's good. He is definitely beginning the Terrible Twos, though, according to Matt, and he won't be two for a couple more months."

The doctor smiled and said, "Good. Well, I'll tell you the results straight up. The tests showed that Landon's sweat is full of something called chloride. There was a lot of it. We think Landon has a lung-digestive disease called cystic fibrosis."

Matt and Julie looked at each other and thought, _What in the world is cystic fibrosis?_

Matt asked, "What causes this disease, and how do we fix Landon?"

The doctor said, "Cystic fibrosis is a recessive genetic disorder, and at the present time, there is not a cure. Patients typically have excessive mucus secretions that result in repeated, frequent respiratory infections, namely pneumonia. Patients also have trouble absorbing food due to low pancreatic function, leading to them not being able to put on weight easily." The doctor then added, "Cystic fibrosis reduces lifespan greatly Most patients die in their twenties or thirties from cardiorespiratory failure. And Landon will eventually need a double lung transplant."

Julie burst into tears.

Matt was silent and then asked, "Is there a chance our two daughters have this disease, too?"

The doctor said, "Yes. When both parents carry the recessive gene, and you apparently both do, each child has a one in four chance of having it."

Matt said, "Oh, God," and burst into tears himself. As they left, the doctor said, "I'm so sorry."

Matt could hardly drive home because the tears were blurring his vision. This was the worst day of his life by far. Even his own illness wasn't as bad as this. One-maybe all-of his children had a serious disease for which there was no cure. Julie told Matt to pull over so he wouldn't have an accident, but Matt continued to drive so he could get home and hug Landon.

When Matt got home, the first person he saw was Lily. Lily saw him crying and said, "What's wrong, Daddy?" This made Matt cry even harder, because he had no idea how to tell this to an almost-five-year-old.

Lily hugged Matt and said, "Daddy, it's okay. I'm here. It's okay."

As Lily comforted him, Matt thought, _Lily doesn't know that everything's not okay. Our lives are never going to be the same._


	19. The January From Hell Part 4: Deja Vu

Matt had little time to absorb the blow that had been handed down to him. The conference championship game was on Sunday and there was no time to brood. But Lexi's health was improving, at least. She was no longer on the ventilator and had graduated to ordinary nasal prongs.

A week after her birth, the doctor said, "We should probably do a blood test on Lexi, just to rule out cystic fibrosis. Because CF is genetic, sometimes the siblings have it as well."

Matt objected, saying, "Lexi's breathing is improving, not getting worse. CF patients have greatly reduced respiratory function. Landon was only diagnosed a few days ago and even I know that. We're probably in the clear with Lexi."

The doctor said, "We should do the blood test, just for peace of mind."

Julie said, "It would give us peace of mind to do the blood test and just rule the thing out now."

Although Matt had qualms about it, they finally let the doctor do a blood test on Lexi. She was much better behaved than Landon had been for his blood test. The doctor said he would call them when the results came back.

The next day was the conference championship game. Before the game, Julie surprised Matt by showing him that she had made a miniature, baby-size jersey for Lexi.

Matt said, "You actually made that?"

Julie said, "Yes, I did. I needed to do something those five months I was on bed rest. The things we do for our kids, huh?"

Matt said, "That's right." He put the jersey on Lexi as best as he could and said, "Lexi, Daddy's going to win this game and go to New Orleans to win the Super Bowl for you and your big sister Lily and your big brother Landon. This is a promise I am making to you."

Matt went out and played very well and did end up winning the game and was back in the Super Bowl for the second time in three years. He was coming through for Lexi.

The next day, Matt received a phone call from the doctor who had done Lexi's blood work.

"Hello?"

"Hello. "

"So, what's up?"

The doctor said, " We got the results of Lexi's blood test back."

"Yeah?"

"Unfortunately, she has an elevated level of the same blood marker as Landon." Matt's heart sank; he knew what that meant. The doctor continued, " But a blood test is not always a reliable indicator of cystic fibrosis, so she needs a sweat test, which is the confirmatory test for CF. I'm very sorry to have to tell you this."

Matt hung up and cried. He thought,_ Not only is my only son suffering from a disease that I've barely heard of and has no cure, but now my daughter, born on my birthday, is sick, too._ Even though the doctor said they needed a sweat test, Matt knew that was just to cushion the blow. He knew what the sweat test would show. Lexi had cystic fibrosis, too.

Matt knew he would have to call Julie, and he wasn't looking forward to it.

Luckily, he didn't have to; Julie called him right then.

"So, what's up?" she asked.

Matt sighed and said, "You're not going to believe this."

"What's wrong?"

"They got Lexi's bloodwork back."

"And?"

"She has it too."

Julie was stunned. The doctor had done the blood test to give them peace of mind and rule out the possibility of Lexi having CF.

"Are you sure?"

"She has an elevated level of the same blood marker as Landon. They said they wanted to do a sweat test, but I don't think it's a coincidence that they have an elevated level of the exact same blood marker. Do you?"

"No, I guess not."

They both just stood there crying for awhile, stunned and saddened by the suddenness of the two diagnoses.

Matt had even less time to focus on this with the Super Bowl ahead. But it was hard. Landon and Lexi were sick. But they weren't typical sick kids; they had a serious, incurable genetic disorder. It was hard to fathom because they both seemed fine. Except for being very skinny, Landon looked and seemed perfectly normal. There were so many thoughts going through Matt's head and so little time to think.

In the Super Bowl, Matt was the MVP and a champion for the second time in three years. But he didn't go to Disney World like he had two years earlier. He had undergone a long, stressful season and was glad it was over. As a result, he didn't enjoy his second Super Bowl win very much.

Two days after the Super Bowl, Lexi came home from the hospital after spending two and a half weeks in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. When Matt strapped her into her car seat and Lily and Landon were fighting over who would hold her first when they got home, Matt leaned down so only Lexi could hear him and said, "Lexi Saracen, you are not going to get sick. No way you get sick. You're too much of a fighter."

Author's Note: My longest chapter yet. I've decided to go into more detail now that a lot more things will be happening from here on out. Please review!


	20. Neonatal Blues

After Lexi came home, life at the Saracen house changed dramatically. In March, Lily turned five and Landon turned two. Lily started playing hockey, and proved herself to be an excellent player despite her young age. Of course, she insisted on wearing number seven, just like her dad.

Julie, on the other hand, was in a fog. Lexi was a very colicky, fussy baby, which greatly frustrated and distressed Julie. The combination of a fussy. colicky newborn and the sudden shock of the two CF diagnoses were too much for her to handle. She ended up slipping into postpartum depression. Although it took a long time for her to recover, thankfully, eventually, she did.

That summer, Matt and Julie had Lily tested to see if she was a carrier of the cystic fibrosis gene. They were scared to death, even though the doctors assured them it was extremely unlikely that Lily would actually have the disease. The doctor called them when the results came back.

Julie hung up the phone and said, "Matt, Lily is not a carrier. The tests did not find the cystic fibrosis gene at all. So she will absolutely never have to worry. Isn't that great news?"

Matt said, " Yes. That's wonderful." However, despite the happiness they felt at hearing the good news about Lily, Matt could not help wondering, _Not only does Lily not have the disease, she doesn't even carry the gene. Why was she the only one of our children spared? Why?_

Lily walked in and said, "Daddy, you said Landon and Lexi are sick, right?"

Matt thought, _Oh, boy. Here come some tough questions. _He told her, "Yes. But they're not sick like you would be sick if you got a cold. They're sick because something's wrong inside them."

"What made Landon and Lexi sick, Daddy?"

Matt sighed and told Lily, "Well, Landon and Lexi were born... You know how I always have a game plan for every game?"

"Yes."

"Well, that's kind of what made them sick. Something's wrong with their 'game plan', or genetic blueprint. Your genetic blueprint is full of genes. Not like blue jeans, but these genes make you you.'

"I don't get it."

"Well, Lily, your genes say that you are a girl, you have brown hair and brown eyes and great athletic ability."

"Now I get it."

"Landon and Lexi, on the other hand, have a gene that isn't healthy. This gene tells them to have cystic fibrosis."

"Do you and Mommy have the gene?"

"Yes, Lily. But Landon and Lexi have two copies, and Mommy and I only have one. You need two to have cystic fibrosis. So Mommy and I only carry the gene."

"Do I carry the gene?"

"No, Lily. You do not."

Lily looked at Matt and said, "Why? Why don't I?" This absolutely broke Matt's heart, because he had no answer for that question.

As the new season began, Matt hoped that it would be less stressful than the previous one. But it did not work that way.

In a game in October, Matt got hit by a defender on a blitz that he had never seen coming. The hit slammed his head onto the ground, and he suffered a concussion. He immediately tried to get to his feet, but the trainers came out and told him, "No, no, you need to stay down." Matt laid on the field as a stretcher was brought out.

Jason Street, who happened to be watching the game, had flashbacks of his own injury thirteen years earlier. He said, "Come on, Saracen. Get up. Get up." Even though he and Matt hadn't actually seen each other since Jason had visited him after Matt's second cancer surgery, they still communicated often and had become friends.

As Matt was strapped to the stretcher, he gave a thumbs-up to let Julie and his kids know that he was all right. Once Matt got to the hospital, he was examined and the doctors s recommended that he be placed on IR and not play for the rest of the year. Matt wasn't happy, but he knew it was for the best. This was the first major injury Matt had ever suffered in thirteen years of football, counting back to his high school days. He laid down, tried to close his eyes, and thought, _How could things get any worse?_


	21. When CF Attacks

Naguabo: Thank you for the reviews. Keep in mind, too, that this is my first ever story. I really love getting reviews, they inspire me to update. Keep at it!

Later that week, Matt got a call from Julie. She said, "Landon is at the doctor's. He's been wheezing lately, so the doctor wanted to see him."

Matt replied, "Well, what do they think is wrong with him?"

Julie said, "The doctor thinks it sounds like he may have a cold. So they want to take a look at him."

Matt initially thought, _A cold? That's it? Why would they want to see him over a little cold? That's no biggie. _However, he almost immediately remembered that although a cold wouldn't be a big deal for a healthy person, for a cystic fibrosis patient like Landon, it could potentially be fatal. So Matt called home, made sure Lily and Lexi were settled with the baby-sitter, and drove over to the doctor's office to be with Julie and Landon.

Landon was lying on the examining table and was crying because the pulse-ox monitor was pinching his toe. He said, "Daddy, get this thing off! It pinches! I don't like it!"

Matt told his son, "Landon, I know you don't like this, but you need it. It's measuring how much oxygen you're getting." He knew Landon, being only two and a half, wouldn't understand what that meant at all, but he still thought Landon needed to know why it was on him.

The doctor came in then. Matt looked at him and asked, "Well, what's the deal?"

The doctor said, "Landon's blood oxygen levels are low."

"How low?" asked Julie, obviously concerned.

"Eighty-two. Normally, they should be in the upper nineties. We also did a chest X-ray on Landon, and it showed some darkish spots in his lungs. So his cold has become pneumonia. As a precaution, we should probably admit him to the hospital."

Landon said, "No! No! No hopsical!"

Matt said, "Landon, you need to go to the hospital so you can get well. You'll get better if you cooperate."

Julie added, "Plus, Landon, you'll get to wear a really cool hospital gown!"

Landon seemed to perk up a bit and asked, "Wike Daddy's cool sirt he aways wear for games?"

Matt said, "Yes, yes, exactly like the cool shirt I wear for games! And, Landon, it's not a shirt, it's a _jersey_. " Landon looked confused, so Matt said, "I'll explain it later."

"Okay," said Landon.

Matt went back home to tell Lily and Lexi that Landon was going to the hospital.

"What's wrong?" asked Lily, obviously worried about her brother.

"Well, he caught a cold that turned into pneumonia," said Matt.

"What's pneumonia?" asked Lily.

"It's when the cold basically settles into your lungs and chest and makes it hard to breathe."

"Is he going to be okay?"

"Well, Lily, the doctors at the hospital are going to try to make him all better, okay?"

"Okay."

Matt drove back to the hospital and learned that Landon was now in the PICU. Julie was already in his room, trying to read _The Cat in the Hat Comes Back_ to him, but Landon seemed distressed. When Matt walked into Landon's room, he immediately perked up and called, "Daddy!"

Julie said, "Thank goodness you're here, Matt. Landon's been crying the whole time for you. He wanted his daddy."

A nurse walked in to take Landon's vitals. She said, "Hi, Landon. You're a cute little boy. How old are you?"

Julie said, "He's two and a half, but he'll be three in March."

The nurse seemed surprised. She said, "I thought he was already three. Probably because he's so tall." After the nurse took Landon's temperature and blood pressure, she left.

Matt looked at Landon. He was lying on the hospital bed, and he looked so fragile. Although Landon was quite tall for his age, he looked tiny on the bed. He also had a pulse-ox monitor on his finger, a heart monitor on his chest, and oxygen tubing in his nose. Matt wanted to cry, but he knew he had to be strong. He said, "Landon, buddy, Daddy is so sorry that you have to go through this. I know you don't understand why this is going on, but I wish it was me going through this and not you."

"So do I," said Julie. She stroked Landon's blond hair-same color as hers-and said, "Mommy and Daddy are here for you buddy."

As Landon's hospitalization continued, Matt would rotate between being at the hospital with Julie and Landon and at home with Lily and Lexi. Julie was by Landon's side 24/7 except for bathroom breaks. On the third day of Landon's hospitalization, the doctor was concerned about Landon's labored breathing. He was grunting and his chest was caving in whenever he took a breath.

The doctor said, "Landon should probably go on a respirator. His breathing is becoming so labored that I'm worried that it could put too much of a strain on his heart. The respirator will make it much easier for him to breathe." So Landon went on the respirator. He was also being given IV medication to kill the infection. Matt and Julie felt helpless seeing their son being so sick and not being able to do a thing about it. Matt looked at Landon, attached to the respirator, and thought, _How long will it be before Lexi gets really sick?_ He knew it was inevitable, as Lexi also had cystic fibrosis. With Lexi, it wasn't a question of if, but when.

About a week after Landon was placed on the respirator, the doctors brought up something Matt and Julie had never even considered. He said, "As you know, CF patients have trouble putting on weight. In the nine months since Landon was diagnosed, he has put on virtually no weight at all. As he is already seriously underweight, this is a major problem. I think it could really benefit Landon a lot if he had a feeding tube."

Matt said, "A feeding tube?! Why in the world would he need a feeding tube? He can eat and swallow easily. It's practically all he does."

The doctor said, "I know. He will still eat orally as he usually does. The tube feedings would just be like a supplement. A feeding tube would allow food to go directly into his intestines instead of having to be broken down by his stomach and pancreas, which is not doing a good enough job of breaking it down. The food is only being digested by a few enzymes in his stomach, and not by his pancreas. If we can get the food directly into his intestines, we can bypass that problem and he can get extra calories and be able to put on weight. Once he puts on weight, he'll be stronger and be better able to withstand all the inevitable respiratory infections that take a toll on children with CF."

The doctor left, leaving Matt and Julie to discuss it themselves.

"I think what he said made a lot of sense," said Julie

"Yeah," said Matt. "If it could help him gain weight, then it would probably be a good thing for him. He is a skinny little thing."

Julie said, "I think we should do it." So they went out and told the doctor that they would give Landon a feeding tube and see if it helped any.

A few days later, Landon had surgery to put in the feeding tube. Matt and Julie prepared him for it by telling him that the doctor was going to put something in his tummy to help him absorb more food so he could gain weight and get big and strong.

Landon's surgery to put in the feeding tube went smoothly. Shortly after the surgery, he came off the respirator. A few days after coming off the respirator, he was back home. The first- but certainly not the last-CF crisis was over. Landon was home and healthy again.


	22. Merry Christmas

Naguabo: Thank you!

Author's Note: This chapter is basically just Christmas fun, so of course, no drama.

"Okay," said Matt. So it's all settled."

"And?" said Julie.

"They can come."

"Who can come?" asked Lily, who had just walked into the room. Lexi was taking a nap and Landon was receiving a breathing treatment, necessary for CF patients. Not only had they gotten Landon a feeding tube in the hospital, but they had began breathing treatments with the nebulizer, chest therapy and medications to reduce the infections in his lungs.

"Jason."

"Who's Jason?"

"One of my old friends from school. He played football with me. Actually, he was the big star in high school. But he got hurt, so I took over."

"Oh," said Lily, not really interested. Changing the subject, she pulled out a paper from her backpack and said, "Look, Mommy. Look, Daddy. Look what I made at school today." It was Lily's last day of school before Christmas break, and the class had made a special art project.

"Look," said Matt. "Those are your hands!"

"Yeah," said Lily. "The left hand is the red one and the right hand is the green one."

"Wed means 'top and gween means go," said Landon, taking off his nebulizer mask.

"Landon, put that mask back on right now!" said Julie. "And how do you know that?"

"Daddy." Landon shrugged and put the nebulizer mask on.

"Mommy, is it Christmas yet?" demanded Lily. She asked this question at least ten times a day.

"No, Lily. It's still December 17th, just like it was when you asked when you woke up, before you got in the car to go to school, and after school. There are still eight more days, okay, sweetie?"

"Okay," said Lily. She walked out and said, "December is sure slow."

Two days later, Matt, Julie and the kids were making plans for all the guests they would be having for Christmas.

"You said your friend Jason was coming with his family, right, Daddy?"

"Right, Lily."

Lily counted on her fingers. "So it'll be them, Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt Gracie, 'Uncle' Landry-" Lily and Landon called Landry "Uncle" even though he was not really their uncle-"G.G. Mama-" G.G. Mama was the name Lily and Landon had given to Matt's grandmother, who was still in Texas, but managed to visit Matt on holidays-"me, Mommy, Landon, Lexi, Teddy and you."

"That's right, Lily. We are going to have a full house at Christmas this year, " said Matt. Teddy barked upon hearing his name and went back to sleep. "Now," said Matt, picking up Lexi, "we need to set some rules for behavior when all the guests are here."

"Wike what?" asked Landon, who was receiving chest therapy-it was Julie's turn to work on him.

"Well," said Matt, "first of all, Lily, don't say things that aren't appropriate or are embarrassing that you think are funny. My immature friends might laugh, but some things, you're not supposed to say, all right."

"All right," said Lily.

"Also, Jason is in a wheelchair, so I don't want to hear any comments about that, okay?" Lily nodded. "And Landon, please don't act like a baby or be shy."

"I not a baby. I a big boy."

"Right," said Matt, very proud of his kids.

"What about Lexi?" asked Lily.

Matt looked at Lexi and said, "Lexi, do whatever you want. Since you're the youngest and a baby, you can get away with murder. The only rule for you is don't touch the Christmas tree." Now that Lexi was mobile, it was quite a challenge to keep her away from the Christmas tree. Julie had finally suggested putting a baby gate up to keep Lexi away. It worked pretty well, but Lexi was mesmerized by the tree.

"Oh, Daddy, are you coming to the Christmas play?" asked Lily.

"I don't know."

"But I'm a sheep this year."

"You were a sheep last year."

Julie took a break from the chest therapy and said, "Another one of our kids is in the play, too."

Matt said, "What? Landon's not in the play."

"I wasn't talking about him," said Julie. "Think younger."

"What?"

"Lexi is playing baby Jesus. It's a surprise."

"Then why are you telling me now?"

Julie smiled and said, "Because I signed her up last week and forgot to tell you. Surprise!"

Matt rolled his eyes and said, "Okay. If Lexi's playing baby Jesus, I'll go."

"Yay!" said Lily, obviously delighted.

December 21st

"When are they going to get here?" asked Lily. The Streets were supposed to be arriving that day and Lily and Landon had decided to watch for them.

"Any minute," said Julie. "More hot chocolate?"

"Yes, please," said Lily. "My hot chocolate is now cold chocolate."

"Mine too," said Landon.

Matt came down and said, "Hi, guys. The Streets should be here in about a half hour."

"How long is that?" asked Lily.

"As long as a TV show."

Lily took a bite of animal cracker and said, "Come on, Landon. Let's watch _SpongeBob_!"

Sure enough, just as the show was ending, a car pulled up. "We're here!" called Jason.

"Hi!" called Matt. He saw Jason, Erin and their kids all come in. "Is this Noah?" asked Matt. "I haven't seen you since you were five years old."

"Five years old? That's how old I am!" said Lily.

"I'm two!" said Landon, happy to play.

"Then you're in luck," said Jason, "because my girls are also five and two. Jacey-Lynn! Emerson! Come here!"

Jacey-Lynn, who was five, started immediately talking to Lily, but two-year-old Emerson was quite shy. She kept hiding behind her mother, obviously not sure what to make of it all. Just then, Teddy ran up.

"Look! A doggie!" screeched Jacey-Lynn.

"No, Jacey-Lynn! We don't run up to a strange dog," said Erin.

"Why not, Mommy?" asked Jacey-Lynn.

"Because we don't know if he likes kids or not," said Jason.

"Oh, Teddy's very friendly," said Julie.

"Teddy. That's a cool dog name," said Erin. "How did you come up with it?"

"Long story," said Matt. "What about your girls?"

"Well," said Jason, "we chose Jacey-Lynn as a variation of my name. She looked so much like me when she was born, it only seemed natural. And for Em, we obviously wanted an 'E' name for Erin, and she just looked like an Emerson." He looked around and said, "So, what about yours?"

Matt said, "Oh, this Lily and Landon. We also have a baby, Lexi, but she's asleep."

With that done, the families spent the rest of the day socializing and catching up.

Christmas Eve

"Are you ready?" asked Julie. She was backstage helping Lily get her sheep costume on.

"Yeah," said Lily. "I love being a sheep! Are Grandma and Grandpa watching?"

"Yep. And Aunt Gracie. And Landry and G.G. Mama."

"Yay!" screeched Lily. She joined her fellow sheep and said, "And I'll see you later, Lexi!"

In the stands, Coach Taylor said, "I can't wait to see my granddaughter perform. "

"Me, too!" said Tami.

"Me three!" said Gracie.

The curtain rose and the Christmas play began. Matt just kept waiting for the shepherds so he could see Lily.

The play was a huge success. Lily did great and Lexi was a perfect baby Jesus. Soon, everyone was singing "Joy to the World" as they were leaving the church.

"What a play," said Landry. Lily ran up then.

"Joy to the world, the Lord has come. Let earth receive her king! Let every heart prepare-"

Matt picked her up and said, "Lily, we heard the song. Okay?"

"Okay, Daddy."

After a great party, Matt noticed that Lily, Landon, and Lexi needed to go to bed. Lexi would be easy. Matt just picked her up and put her in her crib, where she immediately fell asleep. "Good night, Lexi, and Merry Christmas," said Matt.

Landon went to bed next. Before putting him to sleep, Matt put Landon's CPAP machine on. The CPAP (continuous positive airway pressure) was a machine that would give Landon oxygen while he slept. It was worn as a facial mask and Landon hated it.

Once the mask was finally on, Matt said, "Good night, Landon. Merry Christmas."

Lily was the hardest. She kept trying to stall by singing as many Christmas songs as she could. Matt finally decided to give up and simply said, "Good night, Lily. Merry Christmas," above Lily singing "Jingle Bell Rock."

***  
"It's Christmas!" screeched Lily. She ran into Matt and Julie's and sang, "Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock! Jingle bells ring and jingle bells-"

"Okay, Lily, we're up," said Matt.

Julie said, "Are you really ready to get up? It's only seven o'clock. "

"No," said Matt. "I just didn't want to hear Lily sing 'Jingle Bell Rock' anymore."

Once Landon and Lexi were up, they all went downstairs. Lily and Landon got a lot of presents. So did Lexi, but she preferred the wrapping paper. Even Teddy got some dog biscuits and tennis balls.

"It looks like Santa was sure good to you guys," said Julie.

"Yeah," said Landon. "I good boy."

"And Lexi and me were good girls!" exclaimed Lily.

Once the Christmas present unwrapping was over, the Taylors, the Streets, Landry and Matt's grandmother all came over for breakfast.

"Oh, look at the cinnamon rolls," said Lily. "Do you like cinnamon rolls, Jacey-Lynn?

"I love them!" Jacey-Lynn exclaimed.

As everyone ate breakfast, Matt thought about the struggles his family had faced over the past year. Now, it was all forgotten in this brief holiday bliss. For a moment, Matt even completely forgot that Landon and Lexi were sick.


	23. Turmoil, Tragedy and Triumph

The new year had begun and it was time for the double birthday celebration for Matt and Lexi. Julie, Lily and Landon were getting the house ready.

"How old are you going to be, Lexi?" asked Lily, looking at her baby sister, happily sitting in her swing. Lexi held up one finger.

"That's right!" said Julie. "You are going to be such a big girl!"

"What about Daddy?" asked Landon, who was coloring a picture at the table. "How old he be?"

Julie said, "Twenty-nine."

"Dat's weally old," said Landon.

"Well," said Julie, "it seems old to you since you're not even three years old."

"Oh," said Landon, going back to his coloring.

Throughout the day, Julie, Lily and Landon put up decorations and blew up balloons. Lexi just sat and watched, as she was too little to help much.

On the day of the party, Julie brought two birthday cakes out to the table. She had them decorated to look like footballs.

"Okay," said Julie. "Let's sing!" The family sang, "Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday dear Lexi-"

Landon piped up, "And Daddy!"

"Happy Birthday to you!"

Matt picked up Lexi and said, "Thank you so much. It means so much to me to be able to spend my birthday with the four most important people in my life."

"Don't you mean five?" asked Lily.

"Five?"

"Yeah," said Lily. "You've forgotten Teddy." Teddy ran in the room and laid at Lily's feet.

"Oh, right," said Matt. "Hello, Teddy."

"Let's see how Lexi likes cake," said Julie, giving Lexi a slice. Lexi immediately wolfed it down and begged for more.

"Dear God," said Matt, jokingly, "What have you done?"

***  
Despite happy times such as the double birthday, all was not well in the Saracen house. Matt and Julie had been under a lot of stress over the past year and it was starting to show. They found themselves fighting and arguing much more lately. Usually, the fights were over how they coped differently. Matt felt that Julie didn't realize how sick Landon and Lexi were. Julie felt that Matt was fixated on it and wasn't enjoying them as much as he should as a result.

Their tensions boiled over in late March, shortly after Landon's third birthday party. Lily had recently turned six as well.

The night of the party, Julie was cleaning up and called, "Matt, could you give me a hand?"

"With what?"

"Party cleanup."

Matt came down and said, "Toddlers really can make quite a mess."

"Isn't that the truth?" said Julie.

Matt said, "Julie, I don't know how you do it."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know how you can go on planning birthday parties and weekend trips and all that and just pretend that things are okay when they aren't."

"Well, excuse me for not wanting to constantly fixate on our kids being sick and just trying to treat them normally!" said Julie angrily.

"They're not!" yelled Matt.

"I just don't constantly treat them like they're dying, the way you do!" screamed Julie, getting defensive.

"I do not!"

Julie, by now irate, said, "Then why didn't you want Landon to start preschool this year and why did you insist on not letting him out of the house practically the entire winter?"

"I don't want him to get another cold! You saw what happened the last time he got a cold. He could have died!"

"Listen to yourself! Do you realize how ridiculous you sound?" Julie was enraged. "We can't shelter Landon and Lexi forever. What kind of life is that, anyway, to be locked in the house for months at a time so you won't get a cold? That's not really living!"

"I was trying to protect him!" said Matt, now enraged himself.

"Well, you're being overly protective ," said Julie. "Landon and Lexi can't live life in a bubble. You need to get used to that." Julie walked upstairs to go to bed and said, "And don't follow me, Saracen!"

"Then where am I supposed to sleep?" asked Matt, obviously annoyed.

"The couch," said Julie, tossing him a blanket.

Matt knew he wasn't winning this argument. Julie calling him "Saracen" was not a good sign. Matt turned around and saw Landon in the kitchen. His face was blotchy and it was obvious he had been crying.

"Oh, Landon, buddy, did you hear that?" asked Matt. Landon nodded. "Well, it's okay. No one's yelling anymore."

"I want some water," said Landon. "Dat's why I came down."

"Oh," said Matt.

"Why were you and Mommy shouting?" asked Landon, obviously shaken.

"We just had a disagreement," said Matt. "It happens." Matt then got Landon a cup of water and said, "Landon, can I sleep in your room tonight? I don't want to sleep alone."

"Okay," said Landon. The two of them went upstairs. Matt hooked Landon up to his CPAP machine and said, "Good night, Landon. Everything's going to be okay."

"Good night, Daddy," said Landon, his voice muffled by the facial mask. He then fell asleep.

Matt was worried though. Although he had told Landon everything was going to be okay, he wasn't entirely sure if he believed himself. He and Julie had been married for six and a half years and while they had had minor disagreements and arguments, this was the first major fight they had had, and for the first time, Matt wondered whether or not their marriage would survive.

***  
The next morning, Matt said, "Julie, we need to talk. Last night, after you went upstairs, I saw Landon in the kitchen. He had come down to get a drink of water, but he ended up hearing our fight. And he was clearly shaken by it. Julie, we really messed up last night."

"I think so, too," said Julie. " This is starting to get out of hand. I don't think we can handle this ourselves. I think we need professional help."

"Professional help?" asked Matt. "You mean, like a marriage counselor?"

"Yes," said Julie. "I think we may need to go to marriage counseling."

The marriage counseling session was helpful for both of them. Matt and Julie were told that the first year with sick kids was always the hardest, that they should probably just put aside their issues with each other and focus on the kids for now, and that people cope in different ways and they shouldn't hold that against each other. One session was all they needed.

When they got home from the marriage counseling session and had put the kids to bed, Matt told Julie, "I have an idea."

"What is it?" asked Julie.

"We need to start a foundation for cystic fibrosis. You know, a foundation to help raise awareness, to give money to patient groups, and to help science find a cure. We should do this to help other children with the disease who are suffering in anonymity. What do you think?"

"I think that's a great idea!" said Julie. "We need to get the word out."

"And with every touchdown pass I throw, a sum of money will be given towards CF research," said Matt.

"We can call it Touchdowns for a Cure," said Julie.

"Perfect name!" said Matt.

"Okay," said Julie. "Let's do this."

***  
Time went by. Matt and Julie got Touchdowns for a Cure started and running. Landon was evaluated over the summer and was discovered to have gained five pounds since the feeding tube had been put in.

"Wow," said Matt. "That's great!"

"It sure is," said Julie. "Landon really was rail-thin before. I never really noticed that until he gained that weight."

"That's right," said the doctor. "I am very glad to see that weight gain."

The new season began in September. Matt threw for two touchdowns in the first game, one in the second, and three in the third. With each touchdown, a sum of money went to CF research and Touchdowns for a Cure.

In the fourth game, however, Matt ended up hurting his ankle. X-rays showed that the ankle was not broken, just sprained. But he would still have to miss a few weeks.

Two days later, Matt hobbled in the house and noticed Lily watching TV and looking very solemn.

"Hey, Lily, what're you watching?" asked Matt, sitting down next to her. He knew, somehow, that he had to find a way to give Lily enough time and attention.

"SportsCenter," said Lily.

"Well, what's with sad-looking face? SportsCenter isn't sad. You see me on it sometimes," said Matt.

"I know," said Lily. "I was watching the hockey news." Lily played hockey and was a huge fan and followed the NHL very closely.

"Well, what's sad about hockey?" asked Matt.

"There was an accident," said Lily, still looking very solemn.

"Accident?" asked Matt. "What do you mean, an accident?"

"Watch," said Lily. Matt did so and soon realized what she meant.

"It's amazing that those guys both lived," said Matt, after watching the story.

"Yeah," said Lily. "How awful that one player must feel."

"I know," said Matt, holding Lily close and marveling at how wise beyond her years she was.

"We need to follow this," said Lily.

"And we will," said Matt.

About a week later, when Matt came home, he noticed Lily once again watching SportsCenter.

"Did you hear, Daddy?" asked Lily.

"Yes," said Matt. "He died, didn't he?" Lily nodded.

Lily looked at Matt and said, as they walked upstairs to her room, "All day, I've been thinking about a team, a city, a family and a man that have to all be hurting real bad right now."

Matt stopped dead in his tracks, amazed once again at how wise beyond her years Lily was.

Lily continued, "Daddy, I want to change my hockey number to 37, because the guy who died was number 37."

Matt said, "How about honoring both of them? You could wear number 52. The player who survived is number 15, and 37 plus 15 is 52."

Lily said, "Okay. That works. 52."

Just then, Landon called, "Daddy, I think Lexi needs help."

"Then help her with whatever she wants, then," said Matt.

"No, I really think she really needs help," called Landon.

Matt hobbled into Lexi's room and noticed that Lexi's face was gray, she wasn't breathing and her eyes were full of terror.

Landon said, "See, she needs help."

Matt screamed, "JULIE! GET UP HERE! QUICK! LEXI ISN'T BREATHING! HURRY!"

Julie rushed in and got Lexi out of her crib, and said, "Lily, call 911! Tell them we have a baby who isn't breathing." She then starting performing CPR on Lexi.

"Does she have a pulse?" asked Matt.

"Let me check. You take over the breathing," said Julie.

As Matt did the mouth-to-mouth breathing for Lexi, Julie called, "Yes, she has a pulse."

"The ambulance is on the way," called Lily.

Matt and Julie continued to work on Lexi until the ambulance crew came. Soon, Lexi began to breathe on her own again, although her face was still gray.

"We need to get her to the hospital and figure out what caused her to stop breathing," said the medic.

Matt, Julie, Lily and Landon followed the ambulance to the hospital where Landon had spent a lot of time the previous fall. A chest X-ray was ordered and Lexi was diagnosed with pneumonia. Julie followed her to the PICU and told Matt, "You take Lily and Landon home and put them to bed. I'll stay here with Lexi."

"Okay," said Matt, who looked down at Lexi and said, "You're lucky you have such a persistent big brother. And a mommy that doesn't lose her head in a crisis."

In the car on the way Matt said, "I hope that wasn't too upsetting for you two. We had to take you because we'd never be able to get a baby-sitter on such short notice."

"It's okay," said Landon.

"Oh, and Landon, you are a real lifesaver," said Matt. "If you hadn't been so persistent in calling me, I probably wouldn't have gotten to Lexi in time."

Landon replied, "I don't know what I did, but I'm glad I did it."

When they got home, Matt called, "Okay, who's ready for bed?"

"I know Lily is," said Landon, looking at Lily, who had slept all the way home.

Matt said, "Lily, wake up. I can't carry you upstairs with my sprained ankle. You're too heavy."

Lily managed to briefly wake up, say good night, and go to bed.

"Okay, Landon," said Matt. "Here's a riddle for you. What has blond hair, blue pajamas, and is up way past his bedtime?"

"Would that be me?" asked Landon.

"Yes," said Matt. "You need to go to bed because you have school tomorrow." Landon did, and Matt was so exhausted that he went bed himself.


	24. Spooky October

Lexi remained hospitalized for several days before coming home. She needed supplemental oxygen while in the hospital and came home while still on it. Matt asked the doctor, "Just how long is Lexi going to be on oxygen?"

"As long as she needs it," replied the doctor. Matt thought, _What kind of answer was that? Of course she's going to be on it as long as she needs it._

While Lexi had been hospitalized, the doctors noticed that her weight was beginning to plateau. Matt and Julie had decided to go ahead and give Lexi a feeding tube before she fell too far off the growth chart. They had also gotten a second CPAP machine and nebulizer and had started chest therapy for Lexi as well as Landon.

When Lexi was finally discharged, life changed dramatically. Matt and Julie were no longer fighting, but dealing with everything with a sense of humor. Chest therapy sessions became a game.

"Who do you think can get the kids to cough faster?" asked Matt. "Let's have a contest."

"Perfect," said Julie. "Because I have Lexi today and she is a cough machine." Lexi did a fake cough, as if to prove her mother's point.

"Well," said Matt, "we want it more. Right, Landon? Show Daddy your game face." Landon would try to make an intimidating face, which just made everyone laugh.

Matt ended up missing a month of the season due to his sprained ankle. Although he returned to the lineup, his team had lost without him and those four losses had killed their playoff chances.

The offseason soon came. After Lily, Landon and Lexi turned seven, four, and two, respectively, things got crazy at the Saracen house. Lexi was constantly chattering nonstop, though most of it wasn't discernible as speech yet. Landon would point to everything and say, "What's this?" or "Why?" or "What does that do?" He mainly asked these questions about all the medical equipment in the house. Now that he was four, he was beginning to understand a bit more about his condition.

Lily, being a hockey fan, was not happy about the labor dispute in the NHL. She was constantly watching SportsCenter, hoping to get a positive update. Each day, however, brought only bad news.

"Daddy, I don't think there'll be a season this year," Lily told Matt one day.

"Why not?" asked Matt.

"Well," said Lily, "they still are fighting about the whatever-it-is..."

"Collective bargaining agreement," said Matt. As wise beyond her years Lily was, she was still a seven-year-old kid, and it showed occasionally.

"And it doesn't look like they'll stop fighting anytime soon," finished Lily.

Julie said, "Lily, they'll figure something out. They really don't have a choice."

"I hope so, " said Lily.

***  
In July, Landon had begun wheezing again. Matt and Julie knew this meant another respiratory infection. They immediately took him to the doctor, who diagnosed him with bronchitis. Luckily, Landon weathered the bronchitis much better than when he'd had pneumonia almost two years earlier.

Matt asked the doctor "Why is Landon not as sick with the bronchitis now than when he had pneumonia two years ago?"

The doctor said, "Well, there are a lot of explanations. One is that he's older, so he can fight infections better as a four-year-old than he could as a two-year-old. Also, he's not nearly as skinny and underweight as he was when he was a toddler, thanks to the tube feedings. So he's stronger and can withstand it better."

Julie said, "That is really great news. So he won't need the respirator this time?"

"So far, he seems to be taking the bronchitis relatively well," said the doctor. "If that keeps up, he won't need the respirator."

"Did you hear that, Landon?" asked Matt. "You probably won't need a machine to help you breathe this time."

"Yay!" said Landon.

"And no PICU, either," added Matt.

"As long as he's doing this well, I see no reason to put him in the PICU," said the doctor.

"Yay!" said Landon, even though he had no idea what the PICU was.

"Do you want to read a story, Landon?" asked Julie.

"Yeah," said Landon. "Let's read _Arthur_." Landon was very much into _Arthur_ now, and had almost all of the books.

"Okay," said Julie. "We'll read _Arthur_."

***  
Landon recovered from his bronchitis pretty quickly and came home no worse for the wear. The rest of the offseason was uneventful for Matt, and the new season soon began.

All through September, Matt was playing great and got a lot of money for Touchdowns for a Cure.

Before the fourth game of the season, however, Matt felt some pain in his stomach while he was asleep. As it wasn't too severe and didn't last very long, he thought nothing of it. Besides, he was a football player, and aches and pains everywhere on your body was part of the trade.

The pain steadily increased during the hours before kickoff, and during warm-ups, it suddenly began to localize in one spot. Matt came out and played, even though he was starting to sweat profusely and the game hadn't even started yet.

During the first quarter, Matt threw for a touchdown, but it became very clear that something was not right. Matt had never had pain this bad before in his entire life, and it was getting worse by the minute.

As the second quarter began, even Matt's teammates noticed that something was off. In the huddle, one of his offensive linemen said, "Saracen, are you all right?"

Matt gasped, "Yes, I'm fine," but he knew the lineman didn't believe him. Matt didn't even believe himself.

As halftime was approaching, Matt could barely stand fully upright, and the pain was so intense that he couldn't see straight. On the final play of the half, Matt called for a kneel down, took the snap and immediately doubled over in pain. The spectators didn't think anything was unusual, as it just looked like a routine kneel-down.

At halftime, Matt went into the locker room and described his symptoms to the team doctor, who immediately said, "You need to go to the hospital to see what's going on."

Matt immediately called Julie, told her where he was going and why, and went to the hospital.

The doctor at the hospital examined Matt and said, "I think it's very clear what's wrong. This looks like you have appendicitis."

"Appendicitis," repeated Matt. "So I need an appendectomy?"

"Yes," said the doctor. "You need an appendectomy. The sooner, the better. Otherwise, you would be at risk of the appendix rupturing, and that would cause a massive infection that could be fatal."

"Okay," said Matt. "As soon as I tell Julie and my kids what's going on, let's get this done."

Matt soon went into the operating room for an emergency appendectomy. Soon, he woke up and saw Julie, Lily, Landon and Lexi.

"Knock knock," said Julie. "Remember us?"

"Yes," said Matt.

"Hi, Daddy!" said Lexi.

"Does your tummy hurt anymore?" asked Landon.

"Not nearly as much as it did," said Matt.

Lily said, "That's good."

The doctor walked in and said, "Let me tell you something. I am very glad that you immediately went in for surgery. Your appendix had already ruptured. So we put you on antibiotics to stop the infection from turning into peritonitis. "

"When do you think my appendix actually ruptured?" asked Matt.

"Probably no less than five hours ago," said the doctor.

"Whoa!" said Matt. "That means I played an entire half with a ruptured appendix."

"Yes, you did," said the doctor. "You got very lucky. Untreated, a ruptured appendix often leads to peritonitis, which can be fatal. That surgery likely saved your life."

Lily had turned on the TV and said, "Look, Daddy, you're on SportsCenter."

"Cool," said Matt. Then he looked at Julie and said, "Have you noticed that all my ailments and injuries have occurred in October? Concussion, October. Sprained ankle, October."

"Technically, your sprained ankle was in September," said Julie.

"Right," said Matt. "But it was right at the end of September and it caused me to miss all the October games. And now, appendectomy, October. Why is October such a bad month for me?"

"I don't know," said Julie, "but October is the spookiest month of the year."

"'Cause Halloween is in October," piped up Landon.

Matt was glad that his family could all keep their senses of humor. But he was frustrated at another season being cut short by something out of his control.


	25. What Else Can Go Wrong?

After Matt's appendectomy, he found himself growing more frustrated with the bad luck he was encountering. But he continued to work with Julie to maintain a good family life for their kids. Their big fight a year and a half earlier had taught them both some valuable lessons, and they had no intention of making those mistakes again.

One day in January, shortly after Lexi turned three (and Matt thirty-one), Lily called, "Dad, Landon has something to tell you!"

Landon told Matt, "It's Parent Job Day at preschool next week, and they want you to come."

Matt said, "Landon, I'd love to go!"

"Yay!" said Landon, obviously thrilled that Matt would be coming.

"But it's time for your chest therapy right about now," added Matt. "Have you taken all your medicine today?"

"Yes, I have," said Landon. "Taking medicine isn't so bad, but I hate chest therapy. It's torture."

"Yeah! Chest therapy torture!" said Lexi, who hated it as well.

"I know you don't like it," said Julie, who had just walked in, "but you need it every day to get all that yucky stuff out of your lungs so you can breathe better."

"Okay," said Landon, sitting on the couch and bracing himself for chest therapy.

***  
The next week, Matt went to Parent Job Day at Landon's school, just like he had promised.

The teacher had each of Landon's friends introduce their parent. When it was Landon's turn, he walked up to the front of the classroom and said, "This is my daddy. He plays football."

Landon's classmates were all impressed.

Landon added, "He throws the ball and tries to throw a touchdown for me and my sisters. He's won two Super Bowls." Landon was only four, so he didn't quite understand what the Super Bowl was, but he knew it was really good. "My daddy is the best."

Matt looked a little embarrassed and said, "Well, I don't think-"

"And do you know why he's the best?" continued Landon. "Because he's my daddy."

"Thank you, Landon," said Matt.

***  
The offseason was uneventful, just like it had previously been. Lily turned eight and Landon turned five and graduated from preschool. Lily was very happy when the hockey labor dispute was finally settled.

Matt had fully recovered from his appendectomy and hoped to wipe the slate clean yet again for the new season. A few days before the season started, Lexi came down with pneumonia. Luckily, it was a mild case and she didn't need to be hospitalized and recovered quickly.

In the first game of the season, Matt was hit by bad luck again. He took a hit from the side and suffered a knee injury. As he lay on the field, holding his knee, Lily said from the stands, "That was cheap!"

Julie said, "Lily, enough."

"But it was!" said Lily.

On the field, the trainer told Matt, "You need to go get an MRI. You may have torn a ligament."

Matt sighed and said, "You can't be serious!" But he went to the locker room and told Julie and the kids he would need to go to the hospital to get an MRI.

Julie and the kids met Matt at the hospital, where they were awaiting the MRI results. Landon said, "Daddy, we saw what happened."

"Are you okay?" asked Lily.

Matt said, "No, Lily. I think I really hurt my knee."

Lexi added, "That mean man pushed you down and hurt you." Even though Lexi hadn't really been acting like herself since she'd had pneumonia a couple weeks earlier, she was still aware of what had happened during the game.

Matt told Lexi, "Lexi, it was a good, clean, football hit."

Lily retorted, "Dad, you aren't fooling anyone. I'm only eight and even I can tell the difference between a clean hit and a cheap shot."

Julie added, "She even said as much when she first saw the injury."

Matt said, "Okay, fine. You're right, Lily. It was a cheap shot."

The doctor came in then and said, "We have the MRI results. You tore your ACL. You need surgery and your season's over."

Matt sighed and thought, _Great. What else can go wrong?_


	26. Lexi

A couple of weeks after Matt's knee injury, he came home to find Julie with a concerned look on her face. She told him they needed to talk. As they obviously spoke quite often, there was nothing unusual about this. But this conversation would be the beginning of the worst twenty-four hours of Matt's entire life.

Julie said, "Matt, I think something's wrong with Lexi."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you know she hasn't been acting like herself lately."

Matt told Julie, "How does her breathing sound?" That was the usual health question involving Landon and Lexi, as they both had CF.

Julie said, "Her breathing seems all right, but... I can't put my finger on it, but I just think something's wrong."

Matt walked over to the couch where Lexi was sitting and watching _SpongeBob Squarepants _and asked her, "Lexi, how are you feeling?"

Lexi said, "I feel yucky."

Matt said, "Oh, you feel yucky, do you?"

Julie asked, "Do you think we should check her vitals?"

"Sure," said Matt, getting out some of their medical paraphernalia. The first thing they used was the pulse-ox monitor.

"What're her oxygen sat levels?" asked Julie.

"96."

"Hmm. That's good, but not great. What about her heart rate?"

Matt checked and said, "Eighty-two."

"Okay," said Julie. "Does she feel feverish?"

Matt put his hand on Lexi's forehead and said, "She does feel a little warm."

"Let's check her temperature."

Matt got out the thermometer and placed it under Lexi's tongue. _Beep, beep, beep._

"What is it?" asked Julie.

Matt looked and said, "She has a slight fever. Her temperature is 100.3."

Looking back, Matt realized that he should have called the doctor right then. But since Lexi's fever wasn't too high, and she didn't seem congested, which was unusual but good, so he decided not to call the doctor.

"Okay, Lexi," said Julie, "I'm going to put you to bed so you can rest, okay?"

"Okay, Mommy," said Lexi.

While Lexi rested, Matt, Julie, Lily and Landon ate dinner. Lily and Landon talked continuously about their days at school, but Matt and Julie had little to say, as they were both concerned that there could be something seriously wrong with Lexi. Although they tried to get that thought out of their minds and convince themselves it was minor, it was still there.

During the night, Julie would periodically get up to check on Lexi. Around two o' clock in the morning, Julie went to check on her and realized that she seemed out of it.

"Lexi, are you okay?" asked Julie.

Lexi briefly opened her eyes and said, "Mommy. Hot."

Julie felt Lexi's forehead. She was really burning up.

"Matt!" screamed Julie. "Matt!"

Matt, still half-asleep, mumbled, "What is it?"

"Lexi's fever is up."

"We'll take her to the doctor in the morning."

"It's _way _up. And she seemed to be really out of it. It was like she was semi-concious."

Matt was now fully awake and said, "Call 911."

After Julie called 911 and explained the situation, she quickly got their neighbor to stay with Lily and Landon. While they were waiting for the ambulance, Julie told Lily and Landon what was going on.

"Is Lexi going to be okay?" asked Lily.

"I don't know," said Julie as the ambulance came.

"She's going to be okay, right?" asked Landon. "She can't die, right?"

"I told you, I don't know," said Julie.

"You have to know. You're the mommy," said Landon.

Soon, Lexi was loaded into the ambulance. The paramedics checked her temperature and discovered that it had shot up to a critical, life threatening 105 degrees.

The medics continued to talk to Lexi to try to keep her awake, as she was only semi-concious. Matt got a sinking feeling and a part of him thought, _This is it. Lexi is going to die._

Once they arrived at the hospital, Lexi was immediately taken in for a chest X-ray. It was clear, though, that time was critical. Lexi was fading and fading fast. The chest X-ray results soon came in. The doctor said, "Surprisingly, Lexi does not have pneumonia. There is no evidence of lung infection."

Matt asked, "Then what's the problem?"

The doctor said, "Lexi's chest X-ray also showed a kind of 'water bottle' around her heart. She is showing symptoms of cardiac tamponade-heart compression."

"With what?" asked Julie.

"Fluid. Probably due to some kind of infection."

"I don't understand," said Matt. "How could this have happened?"

"Our records show that Lexi had pneumonia a couple of weeks ago, right?"

"Yes, but-"

"Well, I think, by some fluke, she developed a secondary cardiac infection. What we're going to do is put a needle in her chest to create a small hole in her pericardium to act as a drain and allow the fluid to escape. Once the fluid is gone, her heart will be decompressed and she should stabilize."

Although the doctor's demeanor was comforting, Matt and Julie both knew that Lexi's life hung in the balance. Matt went outside for a minute to call both Landry and Jason while Julie called her family.

Matt said to both Landry and Jason, "We have a real problem. I'm not sure what's going on, but I don't know if Lexi's going to make it."

Landry was at a loss for words and Jason could only say, "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry."

Matt went back in the hospital and just said, "Lexi, come on. Please don't die. Please, please don't die. Please!"

After what seemed like a long time, the doctor came back out.

"Mr. and Mrs. Saracen?"

Matt and Julie said, "Yes."

The doctor said, "Lexi's pericardium was incredibly infected and inflamed. The needle could not get in. We tried, but-"

Matt gasped and Julie burst into tears.

The doctor continued, "We had to make an incision and cut Lexi's pericardium open to allow the fluid to escape. Her heart is decompressed and she is now stable."

Matt and Julie both immediately calmed down. They knew that at least Lexi was still alive.

"Can we see her?" asked Matt.

"Yes," said the doctor. "She hasn't woken up yet-she appears to be in a coma, as the anesthesia should have worn off by now- but she is stable.'

"Why is she in a coma?" asked Julie.

"I'm not completely sure. But I think the high fever is probably why," said the doctor, as he led them to Lexi's room.

Matt and Julie saw Lexi in her bed. If they looked just at her face and not at the huge bandage on her chest, it looked like she was peacefully sleeping. Matt held her hand and just said, "Lexi."

Julie held Lexi's other hand and said, "Poor thing. It seems like she's giving up."

Matt told Julie, "We can't make Lexi want to live. She has to do that on her own." He looked at his daughter and said, "Lexi, come on. You're a Saracen. Saracens don't give up. You didn't give up four years ago and you shouldn't give up now.'

Matt and Julie just stood there in the hospital room, hoping that, in due time, Lexi would come back to them.


	27. A Christmas Miracle

The days went by. Lexi still lay in a coma. Matt told Julie, "Lexi being in a coma is all my fault."

Julie said, "What? That is not true."

Matt said, "Yes it is. I should have called the doctor when I first realized she had a fever. If we had gotten her to the hospital earlier, they would have been able to get the fluid out and decompress her heart before her fever shot up."

Julie told Matt, "Matt, it's not your fault or my fault or anyone's fault, okay? This was just one of those freak occurrences. You know that."

Matt admitted, "You're right." He looked at Lexi-his precious Lexi-who looked like she was peacefully sleeping and told Julie, "What will happen when the press gets word of this? You know they will. We live in the spotlight. When people hear about this, they'll jump to wrong conclusions and judge us. The rumors are already floating."

"What are you going to do about that?" asked Julie.

"I think I should have a televised press conference."

"But you hate press conferences," said Julie. "You've only done a press conference one time, to announce you were sick, and you hated it."

"I know," said Matt. "But this is our daughter, our baby. I think we owe that to her to get the story out correctly before the rumors really start spreading."

Julie told him, "I think that makes a lot of sense."

***  
Two days later, Matt faced ESPN for the press conference about Lexi.

Matt stepped up to the microphone and said, "Good afternoon. I agreed to have this press conference to get this story out correctly for the sake of my family and especially my daughter Lexi. As I'm sure you are aware, there have been rumors that Lexi was recently hospitalized with serious health complications and in critical condition and is currently comatose. I am hear to address those rumors right now. They are true. "

He paused a bit before continuing. "Lexi came down with pneumonia a couple of weeks ago, which the doctors believe caused a secondary cardiac infection and severe cardiac tamponade with extensive pericarditis and extreme pericardial effusion. Her fever got up to 105, which they believe is what put her in a coma. That is what I want to emphasize right now. Lexi is in a coma She is not brain-dead and is not on any sort of life support. She still has brain activity and is stable. She just has not woken up yet. And frankly, I don't know why. No one knows why. We are just hoping and praying that she will. Again, she is in a coma, not brain-dead and not on life support."

Matt continued after another brief pause. "As you can imagine, this has been a very difficult time for us. Lexi's status and long-term prognosis for recovery is still uncertain at this point. I do know, however, that the longer she is in a coma, the less chance of recovery she has. So we just hope that she will wake up soon. Please give prayer and support for my family, because this is a very difficult situation and probably will be for a long time. Thank you."

***  
The entire Saracen family was in the hospital, surrounding Lexi's bed. It had been a week since the press conference, and Lexi still had not woken up. However, they had gotten so much support, not just from fans in Huntington-they had expected that- but all over America. The entire country, it seemed, was rooting for Matt and his family. Matt told Lexi, "Look how many people are hoping you recover. Please, Lexi, wake up. Please." Matt almost lost it, but he managed to keep himself together for Lexi's sake.

Landon said, "Daddy, is Lexi taking a nap?"

Matt said, "Yes, Landon." Then he muttered, "A very long nap."

Lily said, "How was that press conference last week, Dad?"

"Like detention with cameras."

"Why hasn't Lexi woken up?" asked Lily.

Matt held Lily and said, "I don't know."

Landon said, "But you're the daddy. Daddies are supposed to know everything."

"I wish it were that simple, Landon, " said Julie. "But daddies don't know everything. Mommies don't know everything, either."

"What should we do?" asked Lily.

"Just talk to Lexi," said Julie. "The doctors aren't sure if she can hear us, but it can't hurt, can it?"

***  
Another two weeks went by with Lexi still in a coma. It had been about a month since she had gone into it.

The doctor came in that day and said, "Matt, Julie, look... I know this is hard to hear, but.." He led them out of Lexi's room.

"What's going on?" asked Matt. Julie looked scared and on the verge of tears.

The doctor said, "Look, Lexi's condition has not changed in about a month. We've gotten her fever down and she still hasn't woken up. We should definitely have seen more positive signs by this point."

"What are you saying?" asked Julie.

"Look," said the doctor, "I just don't think Lexi will ever regain consciousness."

Matt and Julie cried harder than they ever had in their lives.

"What should we do, then?" asked Matt, after he had composed himself.

The doctor said, "There is nothing more anyone can do for Lexi. I can't swear that she'll never regain consciousness, but the longer her coma lasts, the less the chances are that she will. I would just take Lexi home and let her live out her final days with her family. She deserves that."

Matt and Julie told Lily and Landon what was going on, and Lily was so upset. She loved her "baby" sister and didn't want her to die.

Landon was confused and kept wondering about why Lexi was taking a "nap" for so long. Matt told Landon, "Lexi's not taking a nap."

"Yes she is," said Landon. "Her eyes are closed and she's breathing."

"It's not really a nap if it lasts forever," said Matt, very distraught and upset over the latest development.

The next day, they brought Lexi home to die. The put her bed downstairs and said their good-byes and waited for what appeared to be the inevitable.

Someone forgot to tell Lexi that that was what the plan was. Someone forgot to tell her that these were her last days.

***  
It was ten days before Christmas and Lexi had been home for about two months. She remained in a coma, but was still alive and breathing. The doctors were surprised that she was still hanging on, but continued to tell Matt and Julie that they should be prepared for the worst to happen any time.

Matt had been rehabbing his knee that day and walked in the door and greeted Julie, Lily and Landon. Then he said, "I need to say hi to Lexi, too."

He went over to Lexi's little bed and said, "Lexi, I've been working hard at trying to get my knee all better so I can play again. You're one of the reasons I play."

Matt picked up Lexi's hand to hold it, like he had done so many times before. But this time, Lexi made a fist and drew her hand back.

Matt thought, _Did that really happen? Did Lexi just make a fist and move her hand? Was I hallucinating? _He decided to test it by holding her hand again. She once again made a fist and drew her hand back.

"JULIE! LILY! LANDON! COME HERE!" called Matt, amazed at what was going on.

"What is it?" asked Julie, coming in with the kids.

"Look," said Matt. He took Lexi's hand in his and she once again made a fist and drew her hand back.

"She moved!" said Julie, not believing what she was seeing.

"Yay, Lexi!" said Lily.

"You're the best!" said Landon.

That little hand movement wasn't much, but it was a sign of hope. Two days later, she began to move her arms and shoulders. The day after that, her legs got into the action. Five days before Christmas, the Saracens got an early present-Lexi's eyes briefly fluttered open. It was very clear what was going on. She was slowly, but surely, coming out of her coma.

Four days after her eyes first fluttered open, Lexi had fully emerged. It was Christmas Eve. Although Lexi was like a newborn baby and could not do anything, Matt and Julie didn't mind. Lexi was back, and that was all that mattered.

Everyone was stunned by Lexi's emergence from her three-month coma. The doctors hadn't fully explained why she had gone into it, why it had lasted as long as it did, and why she suddenly woke up. On the day after Christmas, Matt told Julie, "Lexi is a true miracle child. We never should have underestimated her. Even before she was born, the odds were a million to one against her. Yet, she beat those odds then and she's beaten the odds now. She's our miracle."

"Our Christmas miracle," said Julie. "Lexi's recovery is our Christmas miracle." She looked at Lexi and said, "That's right. We're talking about you." Lexi's cheeks turned upward, as if she were smiling. Matt and Julie marveled at their Christmas miracle and watched Lily and Landon play with their Christmas toys.


End file.
